So I don't update regularly... I'm new to this and must admit I had my trepidations about throwing thoughts and feelings out into the digital world for all to see. Then it occurred to me, hell nobody reads this anyway. I'll try to be better.
So, I just returned from a sixteen day stint in Europe, have I got it rough or what! Anyway, I went with the soul desire to return to my art roots painting, drawing, whatever just get back to the feel of the cities and move into the fold and try to make a pretty picture. I just couldn't draw. I wasn't blocked It's just that my artistic endeavor decided to manifest itself in writing instead. So I wrote. A lot. In sketchpads, coasters, bar napkins, walls, even a few people that stood still too long. So what possessed this you ask? Beats me. I just felt I should. I've been struggling recently with my writing. I thank it mainly had to do with two things.
One, I wanted to be an artist. My whole life I've dreamed of sitting in little cafes debating the importance of Dutch impressionists in the French impressionist movement with my artist companions. Getting self absorbed and throwing fits of "Artistic Rage" tantrums when the mood struck.
Two, I have never been overly honest to myself when it came to writing. I have spent the better part of my writing life catering to what I felt others would find interesting and doing my best to not offend anyone in the process. My return to Europe was an awakening for me on many levels. I have been a fan and proponent of Henry Miller from the time I was 8 years old and read a collection of works that included the Air Conditioned Nightmare, but I must admit, I never understood until this past week what he, and for that matter, myself were all about. That and the fact the women in Europe had me walking through most of days in state of frustration with a rock hard penis. Censoring anything is bad. Censoring yourself is a crime against the world. I have censored myself too many times and now the kid gloves come off. Over the course of the next few weeks I will be adding some writings from trip as well as anything else that may strike my fancy. I guess only time will tell how I do.
So, I just returned from a sixteen day stint in Europe, have I got it rough or what! Anyway, I went with the soul desire to return to my art roots painting, drawing, whatever just get back to the feel of the cities and move into the fold and try to make a pretty picture. I just couldn't draw. I wasn't blocked It's just that my artistic endeavor decided to manifest itself in writing instead. So I wrote. A lot. In sketchpads, coasters, bar napkins, walls, even a few people that stood still too long. So what possessed this you ask? Beats me. I just felt I should. I've been struggling recently with my writing. I thank it mainly had to do with two things.
One, I wanted to be an artist. My whole life I've dreamed of sitting in little cafes debating the importance of Dutch impressionists in the French impressionist movement with my artist companions. Getting self absorbed and throwing fits of "Artistic Rage" tantrums when the mood struck.
Two, I have never been overly honest to myself when it came to writing. I have spent the better part of my writing life catering to what I felt others would find interesting and doing my best to not offend anyone in the process. My return to Europe was an awakening for me on many levels. I have been a fan and proponent of Henry Miller from the time I was 8 years old and read a collection of works that included the Air Conditioned Nightmare, but I must admit, I never understood until this past week what he, and for that matter, myself were all about. That and the fact the women in Europe had me walking through most of days in state of frustration with a rock hard penis. Censoring anything is bad. Censoring yourself is a crime against the world. I have censored myself too many times and now the kid gloves come off. Over the course of the next few weeks I will be adding some writings from trip as well as anything else that may strike my fancy. I guess only time will tell how I do.
posted by ill at
12:26 PM
